So I have been at it again. With some time off (July 4 *USA’s Birthday), I have been writing some new music. This is the most recent concoction my abled body could produce. I am looking at how to refine my writing ability so I look for everyone’s input on what they think can improve. I know… this is still quite new and definitely not complete, but I thought it would be fun to see what people think is good and bad.
There are some other new songs in the mix, but this is the first one that is recorded and I like enough to share.
Oh, and I have already heard a few real critiques. 1) My voice is a little shaky when I sing so low. To get optimum sound I should keep it a little higher. 2) The line “Game of Grow Up” some thought a little too ambiguous and other things can be said that would better state the idea. 3) In the last verse, rhyming ‘day’ with ‘hey’ is kind of a writer’s cop out.